Yami's Attic
by Kid9535
Summary: Parody to Camp Granada. Ryou gets hauled off to a sleepoverpartytorturing event by the Yamis and he's writing a letter to Malik and Yugi. T for language.


A/N: Random song, random stuff, random random ran- Okay, forget it. On with the songfiction. I altered the lyrics…Editorials rock!

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Yu-Gi-Oh or Camp Granada

_**Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh (a letter from camp)**_** was a 1963 parody by Allan Sherman of Amilcare Ponchielli's **_**Dance Of The Hours**_

Ryou:

_**Hello Yugi, hello Malik.**_

Yugi &Malik: Hi!

Ryou:

_**Here I am at Yamis' attic**_

'Cough, cough' So much dust!

Ryou:

_**It is very entertaining,**_

'Yawn' Can I go home now?

Ryou:

_**And they say we'll get tortured when they've stopped battling.**_

Bakura: Just you wait Pharaoh, I'll defeat you someday.

Yami: Yeah right Tomb Robber.

Marik: Yeah, I shall be the one to defeat that blasted Pharaoh! Mwa hahahahaha!

(Fighting, cursing and Shadow games commence)

Ryou:

_**I went downstairs with Joey Wheeler.**_

Come on, Joey. It's getting too bloody boring up here.

Ryou:

_**He developed an eczema.**_

Joey: Hey, look, my skin is peeling. Ooh…OW.

_Ryou:  
__**You remember Tristan Taylor...**_

Tristan: Hey everybody, I'm the guy with absolutely no character whatsoever!

Ryou:

_**He got salmonella poisoning last night during dinner. **_

Tristan: AGH! I'm dying! Tell…Serenity…I thought she had a nice ass.

Ryou:

_**All the Yamis hate us mortals,**_

Bakura: Mwa hahahaha! Die you puny mortals! Zorc will destroy you all!

Marik: You are all Mind Slaves!

Yami: I'm the bad-ass Pharaoh pretending to be good just so I can please that goody-two-shoes!

Ryou:

_**And the backyard has zero portals,**_

Oh Bugger! We can't escape!

Ryou:

_**And Bakura wants no singing,**_

Bakura: Stop that confounded song!

Ryou: _  
__**So he sends us all to the Shadow Realm with his Ring.**_

Bakura: Perish and let your souls suffer in agony puny mortals!

Ryou:

_**Now I don't want this should scare ya,**_

Please, please let it. Send me home!

Yugi & Malik: Ahhh!

Ryou:

_**But then Pegasus has malaria.**_

Yugi & Malik: (Chatting)

Ryou: Hey!

Yugi & Malik: …Huh? Oh. Ahhh!

Ryou:

_**You remember Seto Kaiba...**_

Kaiba: Hello you pathetic duelists, I'm the egomaniac self-absorbed multi-millionaire. This song will give me the opportunity to stroke my ego!

Yugi & Malik: Who is he?

Everyone else: Yeah! Who IS he?

Ryou:

_**He got stuck in a closet with poor Teá. **_

Yugi: Who's Teá?

Teá: Don't you remember me Yugi? I'm your annoying girlfriend who is totally obsessing with you, your sexy alter ego, and friendship! Go friendship! Friendship can overcome anything! Blah blah blah

Malik: Agh! Bitch-alert! Quick Yugi! Shield me with your ability to withstand crap and freaky hairdo!

Kaiba: Hey, what about me?!

Everyone else: Seriously, who was that guy?

Ryou:

_**Take me home, oh Yugi, Malik,**_

Yugi & Malik: And you are-?

Ryou:

_**Take me home, I hate this attic!**_

It's got fuzzballs! I can't breathe!

Ryou:

_**Don't leave me with the Yamis where**_

Nooo! Not the Yamis!

Ryou:

_**I might get pushed off down the stairs. **_

Bakura: And hikari went tumbling down the hill!

Ryou: Actually, yami, it's stairs.

Bakura: Shut up! (Shoves)

Ryou: Agh-(bonk)wah-(bounce)no-(thump) oof.

Everyone else: Well, at least he landed on Teá.

Ryou:

_**Take me home, I promise I will study more,**_

Yugi & Malik: You've already read all the encyclopedias in this house TWICE!

Ryou:

_**And clean the house right to the core.**_

Malik: I can see my reflection in the garbage already.

Ryou:

_**Oh, please don't make me stay,**_

PLEASE, PLEASE LET ME COME HOOOMMMEEE!

Malik: Who are you?

Ryou:

_**I've been here one whole day. **_

AAHHH! TWENTY-FOUR HOURS ALREADY?

Ryou

_**Best friend Malik, good ol' Yugi,**_

Malik &Yugi: We're his best friends? Cool.

Ryou:

_**How's my precious little deckie?**_

Duelist deck: We're fine. But seriously, who ARE you?

Ryou:

_**Let me come home if you miss me,**_

Deck, Yugi & Malik: We don't! Don't come home!

Ryou:

_**I would even let my fan girls hug and kiss me. **_

Fan girls: YES! COME HOME PLEASE!

Ryou:

_**Wait a minute, they've been tested,**_

Police: Freeze! You're all under arrest!

Yamis: What?

Police: We found traces of overdose of cannabis and dope and alcohol in your blood!

Yamis: So?

Ryou:

_**The Yamis all have been arrested.**_

Bakura: When I get my hands on that Ring I'll-

Police: Sir, you have the right to remain silent.

Marik: Oh shut up puny mortal! Obey your master!

Yami: Mind Crush!

Police: I SAID, YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT!

Ryou:

_**Now it's quiet, gee that's betta,**_

(Sweatdrop)

(Sirens slowly disappear)

Ryou:

_**Malik, Yugi, kindly disregard this letter! **_

Malik & Yugi: Don't worry!

(Happily burn letter)

Mm, these sausages sure taste better when you use a desperate written plea for help in a life-threatening situation as fuel!

A/N: Was it just me? Or was that totally random? Please review…


End file.
